CD1

So AF showed her ugly face today. Now I am cramping. Bad. We went and got two tests today because I was tired and kinda yucky feeling. When I got home I saw that it had started. We had sex at the right time but still nothing. We are not happy, but we are alright. Maybe next time.

CD34

Well it's Sunday. I was supposed to start Tuesday. 8 tests so far all negative. The last one I took was on Friday night / Saturday morning in hopes that we would have good news for Christmas. Nothing. I guess now I will just take one once a week if she doesn't come and maybe eventually go to a doctor. I might call to see when they would get concerned tomorrow. I guess now when we find out we will have to wait to tell everyone which will kill us!

BFN & AF is a no show

So AF was due yesterday. I took another test this morning...with VERY strong pee and still nothing. I figure there are a few options:

1: I ovulated but I am not pregnant & AF is just being a B*tch.
2: I haven't ovulated yet
3: I have ovulated, but it was late. I didn't get pregnant & AF will be here soon.
4: I have ovulated, but it was late. I did get pregnant but it is too soon for the tests to know yet.

Those are pretty much the only things that I can think of to make what I am going through happen. I hate this. I am on CD30 now. I have heard horror stories of 6 month cycles after Ortho Evra and I am really hoping I am not one of those. I have gone on & off of it before and have never notice a late period, but I guess you never know.

BFN #4

Well AF was due today. Nothing. She is a no-show or at least a late show. Went to Dollar General today and got 3 more tests. At least these were only $1 each. Held it for 3 hours and still BFN. I will take another in the morning and each morning until I either get 2 lines or AF. I hate this roller coaster!

BFN #3

Test #3. AF due tomorrow. I am no longer hopeful for this month. I swear I see a faint line. I know I am crazy. So does DH. Maybe next month...no Christmas suprise.

No Way!

So I wasn't going to test today, but I got home and decided I wanted to take one. Jon hid it though and he said that if I could find it I could take it. I thought for about 5 seconds, grabbed a chair and looked on top of the cabinet. It was there, exactly where I looked. We have never hidden anything there before. It was totally fate. Now I am just waiting to pee so I can take it! I think it is almost time!

BFN #2 & "The Spot"

I woke up at 2am to pee last night. And don't think anything of that because for me it is completely normal. I figured that was the longest pee would sit in my so I went ahead and took a HPT. BFN. Today is Sunday and I should start on Tuesday, so long as BC didn't change that. When I went to wipe though I had some definate spotting. It was just a little pink on the toilet paper, but it was there. When I went back to bed I definately had some AF type cramps which are still going on. Some in the front but mostly in the back. Feels like she is coming but I really hope not! I don't think I have ever had any spotting before AF, she normally comes with a vengance. And my PMS is normally weird...starts at the same time as AF. I know I am obsessing again but I am wondering if I didn't just ovulate & therefore implant late. Maybe when I was sick to my stomach last week I was ovulating and just didn't know what it felt like because I have been on BC so long! I will know for sure soon but I really hope AF doesn't show!

BFN #1

Just took a test. 4 days early and not morning pee. Bfn #1. It was to be expected. Oh well, off to bd with the hubby to make up for it.

Yes or No

I keep going back and forth. Some things say I am and some say I'm not. I was thinking about it this morning and I was like...so either I'm pregnant...or I'm not pregnant. Wait...that's it. Those are my only options, and obsessing won't change the answer. Not that I am going to stop obsessing. My cervix felt open this morning. I don't know what that means but I think it means I am not pregnant. But I had a sore throat and my temp was up this morning and that means I could be. They have a term for what I am in now. 2ww. I hate it.

"5 days before missed period"

So today would be my so called "5 days before missed period" but we aren't going to test. I want to, of course, but I can't see wasting the money. I will know in five days...or maybe more if I decide just to wait it out til Thursday just in case I ovulated late due to coming off of Ortho Evra. I am really nervous that I simply didn't ovulate this month. Time will only tell.

First Try

Now, where we left off was where Jon & I decided to give the whole "baby-making" thing a go! I tracked and based off my last period my fertility window was December 2-10. We truly tried to have sex every day during that time frame, but life happened. I was sick on Monday, so we missed that day, and Jon was sick Thursday so we missed that one too. After sex I laid there, hips up, and still for what seemed like forever but was probably only a few minutes. I checked my cervical mucus like everything said to but I just didn't notice a change. I may have been doing it wrong...

The 12th, the Sunday after our try I was sick again. But this wasn't the same. I had breakfast but during church my stomach started hurting. But only when I stood up, when I sat down I was fine. I ate lunch and then my stomach hurt again. I didn't eat again until after the Cantata at my husband's parents church and I was fine after that. I kept thinking (hoping) that it was morning sickness. I know Jon was excited over the possibility too. We almost bought a test, but decided that it was too soon. The next day I felt fine though, so I am pretty sure that wasn't it.

That whole day I thought I was pregnant. I kept googling to see when morning sickness could start. I am neurotic by the way! My mind was consumed with it Monday too. I have pretty much convinced myself now though that I am not.

I just got off birth control and that stuff can mess you up and make it take a while to conceive. Also, my husband and I have been together for 6 1/2 years without anything...granted we were actively preventing, but it just seems really unlikely that we would get pregnant that quickly.

I want to be though. I want to be pregnant, I want to be a mom, I want to start our family. We will see some time next week how the test turns out. I should start my period on Tuesday, so I may test then, but normally I start on Thursdays so I may wait. We decided that if we are pregnant this month that we would tell immediate family on Christmas. No one even knows that we are trying yet! If we aren't though then we are going to wait the accepted 8 weeks before we tell anyone.

Our Baby Dreams

We have always wanted children, but with both of us working full time and me going to school part time and him working part time it just wasn't feasible. After I was done with school though, we talked about it. We both want to be able to provide everything for our eventual children, so we made the decision to wait a while. I constantly told him that I wanted one NOW, but he wouldn't budge! Until one day when our friends told us they were pregnant with their second! This was it! The push he needed...if they could have two we could certainly have one! And then we knew that our child would have at least one friend! On November 28 2010 we decided that we would nix the birth control (it was supposed to go back on the next day after my week off) and start trying, actively!

Us, continued

That December I graduated early and decided to go to The University of South Carolina. I was a great student in high school but I didn't do nearly as good as I wanted to therem. You see, USC is an hour and half away from home which meant I was an hour and half away from him. I was driving home all the time and my dad got rid of my room so I stayed with him. I consider this to be when we moved in together. After one semester I decided to move home, with him. We got our own apartment rather than one with roommates and we were happy. I tried going to school in Charleston but I was not motivated. I wanted to make money! Fast forward a few months to February of 2006 and he proposed! We decided to marry on October 14th because 14 is our special number, his birthday, my birthday and when we started dating! He had one stipulation though, I had to go back to school, he knew that I shouldn't have dropped out and blamed himself. We married that October and I started back school, part time that January. We bought our house in May 2007 when I was 19 and he 22. We thought the prices had dropped as low as they would go...little did we know! He took on a second job to help with bills. I was also working full time. I can remember weeks when all we ate was hot dogs, macaroni and green beans! At least it was balanced! Oh and by this time we had expanded our family...we now have a dog and two cats! We did the full time job, part time school/job thing for a while until May 2010 when I graduated and he quit the second job. From then until now we have just been enjoying our time together and doing all those things you miss out on when you are as busy as we are...like eating dinner together every night!

Us

My husband and I met a little over six and a half years ago. I was sixteen and he was sineteen. He was my brother' roommate. He worked a lot and I never really knew much of him until one day when we went to the Isle of Palms. It was my brother, a friend of mine, my future husband (little did I know...) and I. While playing in the water my brother threw me into his arms and I just kind of stayed there. We talked almost 24/7 for the weeks after that day. On June 14th, my husband' 20th birthday he asked me to be his girlfriend. Without hesitation I said I would. After that I was at their apartment all the time! I would go there first thing in the morning with my best friend and wouldn't leave until curfew. Even if he wasn't home we would still. Go there and just hang out, and clean their bachelorpad. I was so nervous for our first kiss. He was older, and a lot bigger, than anyone I had ever dated! He was my first, and only a few weeks after we started dating. He was so polite and gentle too. Asked several times if I was sure. I knew very quickly that he was the one. When I went back to school after the summer I would stop by and see him before school and go back over after. We were inseparable. He made me study before anything else and I made straight As that semester. My dad couldn't believe it! One night he had a party and I told my dad that I was too drunk to drive home, which I was, so he let me stay the night with him. I was drunk and trying to get out of the shower when he told me that he was falling in love with me. I told him that I was falling on him! We laughed, but we both knew.