My Dad texted me on Tuesday and asked if his darling daughter would allow him to take her out to lunch on Friday. I get off at noon on Friday and we have done this 2 or three times before, but I think this time he has an ulterior *sorry, got distracted by & was able to hold a 1 month old!* motive. We totalled up the costs for the trip to Arizona (it was going to me me, Jon, my dad and my step-mom) and for the two of us it totalled $1800! Jon & I made the decision that it was not a good idea to spend that kind of money while I had a year old car & we are trying to have a child (which they don't know about!) I know that Dad was upset to hear that and so was my brother. Dad asked if him paying for the whole rental car would help, and it would, but we want it to be under $1000.00 for the whole trip. My brother asked if it would help if he paid for the plane tickets. I know that Jon won't allow him to do this and he would be pissed off if Michael did because he doesn't want any help from my brother. I really want to go though!
I think that Dad is going to make me feel bad for not going & not spending the money. He wants me & him to go see them and leave the spouses behind. As much as I want to see my niece and nephew I want to do it with my husband. I don't want to go and see the world without him! And its not that my Dad doesn't like my husband either. He knows that Jon is perfect for me, and that he is a great man, hard worker and amazing husband to me. I just think that marriage doesn't mean the same to him as it does to me...seeing as he has been married 3 times.
My Dad & I have had a rocky relationship in the past. He hurts my feelings a lot (unintentionly I hope) and I eventually get over it, but until then I just try to ignore him. After I told him that we wouldn't be able to go to Arizona he didn't call for a while & I get stubborn and don't want to be the one to make the first move. That was the first time I heard from him since he offered to pay for the entire rental car. I don't know what to do but I can almost guarantee that I will leave lunch upset.
Does anyone else's parents give them guilt trips? How do you keep from getting sucked into them?
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